Artist: Relient K
Album: Mmhmm
Song: Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

I watched the proverbial sunrise
coming up over the Pacific and
you might think I'm losing my mind,
but I will shy away from the specifics...

'cause I don't want you to know where I am
'cause then you'll see my heart
in the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus]
Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.
Stop right there. Well I never should have said
that it's the very moment that
I wish that I could take back.

[Chorus]
I'm sorry for the person I became.
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to try and never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been.
Who I am hates who I've been.

I talk to absolutely no one.
Couldn't keep to myself enough.
And the things bottled inside have finally begun
to create so much pressure that I’ll soon blow up.

I heard the reverberating footsteps
sinking up to the beating of my heart,
and I was positive that unless I got myself together,
I would watch me fall apart.

And I can’t let that happen again
‘cause then you’ll see my heart
in the saddest state it’s ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus x2]
[Chorus]

Who I am hates who I've been
and who I am won’t take the second chance you gave me.
Who I am hates who I’ve been
‘cause who I’ve been only ever made me...

So sorry for the person I became.
So sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I’m ready to try and never become that way again
‘cause who I am hates who I’ve been.
Who I am hates who I’ve been.


It's weird, I always seem to come back to this song. At least whenever I feel I've gotten to a point where I can look back on who I was and say "Wow, I can't believe I was really that guy, how stupid of me!" I've done it quite a few times, then it always seems I fall back into who I've been. It's really annoying, I have the best intentions in mind and I just fall. I can't seem to reach those goals. It seems like everytime I say "I'll do it better this time, I'll get back into the Word and I'll do this and that." I never seem to be able to stick with anything. So yeah, that's my rant for a bit.

Oh and Celia, you did wake up last night at about 4:45 (your time) and ask what time it was. Right after one of my rants (really what lead to this one) I would never be able to say if you could hear me, heh. I love you.